What To Do With Clothes That Don't Fit

In almost every clothes session i complete with clients, one challenging question crops up time and time again:

‘What do I do with the clothes that don’t fit me?’

Clothes may no longer fit us for a whole host of reasons. Perhaps you’ve had a baby and you’re weight has been fluctuating for a few years? Perhaps you’re moving into a new phase of life, which means the clothes you used to wear easily are no longer feeing as comfortable as they did? Clothes are extremely personal - it’s one of the reasons why Marie Kondo recommends we start our decluttering journey by tidying up our these items first in the KonMari Method. Clothes reveal so much about our past experiences, our preferences, and our choices in life. They can even slide into the sentimental category when they represent precious memories and moments in our lives. It’s no wonder we want to hold on to them. They bring up so many different emotions.

But herein lies the problem. If the clothes we’re holding on to conjure up negative emotions like guilt, shame, embarrassment, disappointment, fear and sadness, then they are not adding value to our lives. This is especially true when it comes to clothing items that no longer fit. Even if it’s just a few items in your wardrobe that lead to you experiencing a negative emotion, this is enough to taint your whole collection with a feeling of unease every time you enter this space. I believe that the spaces in our home should not bring about negative emotions. No space should ever have the permission to make us feel guilty, unworthy or lesser than. Our homes need to lift us up, containing things that serve us well in life, and make us feel good about ourselves.

If you’re going to go through your clothing intentionally, to experience the greatest level of success and to reclaim the highest level of control, you need to be honest with yourself. Imagine I’m there with you as you bring each item of clothing into your hands; when you come across an item that no longer fits you, I kindly ask you to say this question out loud:

‘Does this item motivate or demotivate?’

If you feel excited to see the item in your hands, and it inspires you to reach your goals to fit into it again, then keep it with confidence. It’s a motivator: just seeing the item there in your wardrobe will give you a dose of determination to continue working towards your vision and goals for the future. This is the positive emotion I’d like to item to create for you.

On the other hand, if you feel a sense of dread looking at the item, perhaps a feeling of guilt, shame and/or disappointment that you haven’t worn the item because it no longer fits, accept that this item is causing you to feel a negative emotion. It isn’t filling you with inspiration like the previous example. On the contrary, it’s dragging you down. This item’s existence in your home is making you feel bad about yourself. And this isn’t healthy. The truth is, it’s a demotivator and no longer serves you. Why should you keep something that brings you down? Take a deep breath, express gratitude for what the item has brought to your life previously, and let it go with confidence.

You may be in a new phase of your life now. And that’s okay. It’s perfectly normal. We don’t need to hold on to the person we were in the past, and we certainly don’t need to hold on to the items that remind us of that person and simultaneously make us feel depressed.

It doesn’t matter why the item no longer fits; what matters is what you’re going to do with the item now. To help you achieve the answer, focus on one key question: ‘does it motivate or demotivate?’

I hope that this post has given you some good guidance, particularly if this is something regularly struggle with. I’m aware that this is a challenging part of decluttering, and can actually stall a lot of people in their tidying progress, so please feel free to share your questions, experiences and insights in the comment thread below.